Just finished reading a book "Mind Gym" by Gary Mack (recommended from James Edwardson). The book is for athletes and is supposed to be a tool you can use to bring your "mind to the gym", where historically we usually only focus on physical strength.

Something that it made me realize was that our mind — mindset, how we framethings / percieve things, etc. — is the only difference between feeling good and bad.

Gary brings up the example of an athlete who plays a terrible game and then two days later, plays best game of his life. In between these two games, nothing physically has changed. Yes, the player might be facing a different opponent who's easier; however, the real difference between the two games is the mind.

It makes me wonder how much stuff we've to our mind to automatically interpret for us — and take us from sad —> happy or happy —> sad — while the real objective reality hasn't changed much.

For example, I was feeling really crummy in June 2020. July - September 2020 was amazing. Now I'm feeling low again. My raw intellectual abilities (i.e. my muscles) haven't changed much during this time. The only thing that's changed is my mind.

Written: December 3, 2020

Update: December 20, 2020

This year has been a rollercoaster for me in terms of outlook on myself and life, mood, etc.

January - June —> I was very low

  • Questioning everything
  • Wondering what I should do with my life
  • Not feeling confident in myself
  • Nihilistic

July - mid-October —> I was very high

  • Couldn't wait to wake up in the morning and get the day rolling
  • Confident in my abilities and being able to make shit happen

Since mid-October —> I've slowly been descending back into lowness.

What I find fascinating about this is the fact that my intellectual abilities nor my situation in life have likely not materially changed over the year and, yet, I have gone from up and down.

What has changed?