I need to delete Instagram.
Prior to August 2020, I had Instagram really only once. It was during summer of 2014 when I lived in Toronto and I had just gotten an iPhone for the first time (RIP BlackBerry). I think I had it for a month or two but ended up deleting it. I justified the decision to delete it to myself that I was already behind on Insta and would never catch up with ppl who had already been on there for 2 years or whatever. And then my overanalyzing mind justified it more that Insta was stupid and for stupid people and it was a huge waste of time (probably me being insecure; this is also the period when I thought sports were completely stupid and a waste of time).
Since then, I've only had it sporadically here and there.
In August of this year, I decided to redownload Instagram. Frankly, I think the main impetus was to find girls. I had spoken to some buddies who have stayed in the Soo since high school and they said that the best way to find girls is via Instagram rather than dating apps. You follow them, they follow you, you watch their stories, they watch yours and then you comment on theirs.
I’ll give it credit; Instagram has been fun. I’ve done some pretty out there stories and it’s funny to see people’s reactions to them. It’s also allowed me to reconnect with some old friends that I haven’t talked too.
Instagram, however, has a more insidious side, at least for me. Once I started using Instagram, I honestly became / have become addicted. Whenever I’m bored, I flick open the Instagram app and start scrolling or creeping.
I've seemed to follow the Hooked framework. Started off checking the app with notifications; eventually, my psychology just wanted to go into the app even when there weren't notifications.
Instagram has become a HUGE consumer of my time and, IMO, this time has been mostly wasted.
What is the ROI of Instagram?
Whilst on Instagram, I am not learning or growing, for the most part. I do follow many philosophy and psychology accounts where I learn things BUT it’s very easy to have one's mind become distracted by other things on Instagram like babes and funny memes.
So the ROI for learning and growing seems low. I should probably read a book instead.
‘Instagram is meant to be fun and a break from everyday stresses’ you might retort. Well, in theory, yes. But with my brain, Insta doesn’t really make me feel great. I start seeing other people and comparing myself to them, which doesn't make me feel good. I start watching stories and see friends having fun together and it makes me sad that I wasn't invited to participate.
Insta also made me really mad when people would not respond to messages when I know they’re online, which I wrote about in "I'm busy". This is actually one of the reasons I started doing fucked up antics with my stories on Instagram; it's almost like I wanted to prove to myself how hypocritical people are.
it blows my mind how many ppl spend a large amount of time on there. I couldn’t believe how many ppl were watching my stories, people who I haven't talked to in years, some I hadn't talked to ever. It's like "get a life, bro".
A potential positive ROI of Instagram is the reason I downloaded it in the first place: girls (for me). Maybe I could find the love of my life on there, which would be a huge Return On Investment. With this being said, I don't think I can "risk" being on Insta to find a partner WITH the other negative ROIs I've already.
What I'm doing about it:
- Delete Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and all dating apps from my phone
- I still do have them on my computer. Debating whether or not to delete them completely or not.
I tend to take things to the extreme. And with deleting them on my phone, this does worry me because for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. I think this has happened to me in the past: I've deleted all these apps and then I get lonely one day and end up downloading them all again, only to waste a week.
I'm taking a risk here: I am risking the fact that I will be able to find a girl without dating apps or Instagram. But hopefully I will find the girl without those means.
Written: November 1, 2020
This article would be paired nicely with:
- Addiction by Design